So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
It's 10am, I'm at grocery store buying booze b/c the bf just told me that he didn't "technically" break up with his ex.
I successfully cooked a taquito with a lighter! My stomach hurts now tho.. im either guna blame it on the undercooked taquito or im feeling guily about porkin my brothers gf a lil bit ago
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
Drug-sniffing dog walked past me and my suitcase in the train station. My opinion: they need a new dog
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
Not sure what time I'll be home. I'm currently topless and the damn stripper won't give me my clothes back
He's balder, I'm skinnier. I win. I. Win.
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
Welp. June's off to a great start. I just ripped my pants, completely sober, at 10:30 p.m.
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
Randomize
