these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
I worked so hard to shave everything last night. EVERYTHING. He WILL be answering my phone calls. Otherwise he's passing up awesome random birthday sex.
Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off.
I just had to take my laptop away from him because he was on Amazon and had 20 Seahawks garden gnomes in his cart.
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
i have to vacuum my washing machine now, asshole
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
Can I just buy you sex toys as a wedding gift? Bc I’m here for that and you
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
I'm sorry I get my lefts and rights confused because I'm dyslexic. But, it took you at least 15 minutes to figure out it wasn't your room OR YOUR HUSBAND.
Randomize
