My key broke off while I was turning the key. I can't pull the broken key out. Not only am i locked outside, so is the rest of the building.
6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
I think its a sure sign I need to get laid when every cloud in the sky looks like a penis.
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
she made me put on a condom before giving me a handjob...this is why i hate freshmen
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
I just had a brazillian performed by a hungarian named olga. Im pretty sure she was trying to rip out my soul. You owe me a million orgasms
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
we somehow managed to fit a llama, a stripper pole and a hayride all into the same day.
Also a shrinking boner emoji would be helpful
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
Oh please. Preoccupy yourself with my penis.
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