What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
True true and the only thing that will burn more than the vodka we will consume is the shame in our loved one's eyes
And yet we make it a tradition to get inappropriately drunk at family functions. We amaze me.
At least it's not a funeral this time... I feel we're making improvements.
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hmm. I hear gunshots, car horns blaring, hear drunk white people screaming, and see about fifty status updates pertaining to the hawks. I guess they won.
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
Just tried to use the bottle of Sprite in my car as mouthwash to get the taste of puke out of my mouth- it's half vodka. Puked again. Thanks man.
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
She told me she ate a whole pizza today, and I just wanted to hug her forever.
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
so i showed up to the bars in a sombrero and a tie as a headband... so yeah, they didn't let me in
I'm so gassy and it's your fault.
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