Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
I think i just called up my ex and talked to her for 20 minutes about frogs and how happy i am to be wearing shorts
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
I lost half a toenail and didn't realize it. Bloody shoe shoulda been a clue.
In the middle of our bar crawl last night we stopped to pet dogs at a dog park. who would let a drunk person bet play with their dog???
I almost had to fight a bird, and you know how scared I am of birds. It found that Percocet that I lost in the grass last week, I threw out my back when I launched myself at that little fucker.
Why would you call when you knew I'd be having sex!?
Why would you answer?
My mom just asked if I wanted a mimosa when I got out of the bath.
I think everything's gonna be okay.
people need to understand when I say I don't want to drink anymore that doesn't mean tempt me with another bottle of Jose Cuervo.
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
Randomize
