Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
a chick just tried to cover her fart by sneezing. it didn't work
Registered for next semester classes drunk. Let's hope I didn't accidently sign up for history of dinosaurs again...
I wasted some perfectly good semen on her
i just remembered last night waiting for you to pick me up wearing my bra on my head to protect me from the rain
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
You sir are most definitely in. Better get your penis an umbrella as that bad boy is gonna get soakkkkkkeddddd.
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
Also, beer. Big fan.
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
Do we have to do this party tonight? I'm worried my bed will miss me...
Just a reminder- you dropped broccoli in my car and then felt bad for it and named him Henry
I know. I miss henry.
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
Randomize
