I am puke
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
Okay, guy from work I want to fuck just told me he liked the font on my PowerPoint presentation. It is so on.
Make me proud, climb that corporate ladder.
My parole officer gave me condoms and a Starbucks gift card ... happy holidays.
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
Today's work quote "if I looked like you, I'd be sitting on everyones face"
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
Things could not have gone more poorly if I had stripped naked and run through the Sahara with sirloins tied to my vagina.
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