So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.
I don't know you.
Have you ever secretly resented a girl for wanting to have sex when all you really wanted to do was rub one out and go to sleep?
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
His dick was as big as my arm. Giving him a handjob was like giving someone an Indian sunburn.
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
I can't find my underwear or one of my shoes but he baked me cookies for breakfast.
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
He actually offered up a silent prayer thanking God for my "tremendous ass." You tell me how my night is going.
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
apparently in the middle of sex, i said "i just really love the food network i watch it every day"
Are you alone?
No, but I have to leave him in my bed while I go on this date.
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
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