I'm really tired of cleaning up my twitter the morning after
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
I feel like "stop licking my face" isn't something that needs to be repeated twice
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
PS: I just woke up from my shower
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
Guy just walked in with a 40 and a Honda steering wheel. Where the fuck am I?
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
Randomize
