i woke up on my kitchen floor, halfway through a text, and my mascara running... this is why i stopped drinking tequila
Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
Headed to the bar now. If I smell faintly of latex and tuna, it's just the new scent I'm trying.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
I just found out my younger brother has me saved in his contacts as "Womb Primer" and I don't know what to do with this information
If I had your ass I would rule the world
I swear I'm going to walk in one day with you in a ballgag just masturbating feverishly
Well i can't stand the sound of my own crying
I boned my sugar daddy for the first time yesterday and now I know why they say guys in their 40s are the best. Also I’m getting a car.
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
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