remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
ugh. my soul tastes like vodka
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
I'm gonna laugh so hard when we're both married with families
That statement alone makes me laugh so hard.
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
tell me why there is a bowl of oatmeal from starbucks in my purse
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
Am I texting you while being used as a stripper pole by two half-naked women? hint: I am.
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.