problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
He called me while he was having sex and asked if I wanted to go get mcdonalds
I want to figure out a way to work "if you suddenly die, I might turn into an extreme hoarders" into my valentines day poem
After the 3rd shot, she was running around singing, "Twinkle Twinkle Big Ol' Dick, on your happy place I'll sit" to your brother.
Put that bitch's torch out. She's been voted off.
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
That's brilliant but could get us arrested. Give me shots until I shout LET'S DO THIS
I may not have my dignity, pride or sanity but I have my pants.
the fact that you beer bonged rum made me so proud, the fact that you threw up an entire footlong tuna melt after... not so much babe
Yay I only have ONE giant mystery bruise from yesterday
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
Sorry about kicking you last night but you don’t mess with a girls margarita bucket. Ever
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