Me too!
Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
Next time i try to unbutton my R.A's shirt with my teeth, please stop me
No promises.
I bought canned wine on a clearance aisle at the liquor store... I feel like I'm living in an episode of It's Always Sunny.
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
Just walked in and was handcuffed to a police woman. Fire fighter woman poured franzia down my throat. Aaaaand I just ate cookies off of Little Red Riding Hood's tits.
she has an amazing ass but I need more beers to get past her horse face. It works out perfect becauseI can use her teeth as a bottle opener.
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
You've been drinking wine and eating bacon all afternoon. HOW IS THAT DOING GOOD?!?!
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
Randomize
