I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
Fuck 8am classes
Dear Jesus I'm gonna throw up through my eyes
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
She sent me a text saying she picked out 17 different Halloween costumes for our kids when they hit the age of 4... The cling factor should have me running right now but honestly I'm just curious
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
I just found him singing into an empty paper towel roll while microwaving an empty ice cream carton. I'm gonna run away now.
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
I think the fact that I stole someone's mail and broke my big toe means that I should consider taking some time away from vodka
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
Through a complicated series of events, I wound up in the desert with a blue chick from comic-con. we lost peter. if you're alive, please come get us.
We were having sex and he started doing some weird swivel move. I was like wtf and he said sorry just trying to pop my knee.
Randomize
