im on my way to getting "i just graduated college with no money, no job, and no plan" drunk
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
Seriously? Time stamp. 2:31 AM. And I am taking self potraits with a tree. Betty Ford anyone?
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
I woke up to a bag of pies and a lot of questions
What's more awkward than your little brother in law screaming, "I SAW YOUR TITTIES" at the breakfast table?
His step dad chiming in on the jokes.
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
I may not be his cup of tea, but I bet I'm his 10th shot of tequila
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
Naked. naked and bneed help.
yknow last night was like... the third night in a row alex woke me up to make sure i wasn't dead and tbh it's sorta sweet.
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
Randomize
