there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
I woke up with a crunchy, pink Pepto streak through my hair, no recollection of the last 6 hours of my night and the feeling that all the hotel's staff knew me on a first name basis.
What? Cold floors are soothing when you have a hangover. How am I supposed to pass that up. Even if I'm at my parents house
it was like a zeppelin in a condom
It's never too late to be topless.
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
Nope, can't do it. It's a snowball effect. Today, leggings as pants. Tomorrow, female hitler. Natural progression.
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
You made me take a photo of you under the stairs at the bar. "Look I'm Harry Potter."
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
Is there a nice, calm way of telling your friend/housemate/former lover/person who does not reciprocate your feelings that your period is late?
Randomize
