she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
For future reference, the blowjob coupons I gave you for your birthday are NOT transferable to pay your friends for tacos.
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
There are two women in my bed. I'm gonna have a bowl of noodles so I can better understand my success.
I seriously just drove by a man walking down the street wearing hospital scrubs, an 80s track jacket, gold necklace and carrying a flute.
I lost a whole day of my life. Apparemtly I was using my deodrant as a phone. And is my phone there?
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
I just bought emergency deodorant at Dominick's and put it on in front of a homeless man while waiting for the bus. He laughed and said 'girl, you a mess'. This is my life.
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't
I woke up in my bed with candy and beer bottles all around me and i dont know where any of it came from. I love valentines day.
Randomize
