My mom came into my room and told me to flip off the tv. I gave it the middle finger. Note to self: STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT
Going back to my hometown to drink absinthe with highschool boys. Remind me to evaluate this decision tomorrow.
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
She tied me up with her honor cords...
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
I'm glad they extended train service last night. People crying, screaming, throwing up, fighting and peeing themselves on a train made me feel like I've got my shit together.
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
So vagazzling was a success
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