I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
This frat boy drinking a forty and wearing a pussy patrol shirt just ran out in front of my car. I should have used less brakes.
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
I've created a drink called, "watching the sound of music with grandma." its straight vodka
I can only get completely wasted and hungry two more times and then we're out of fritos.
Luke did at least 8 shots of pure mayonnaise last night. I am not sure if that is better or worse than my 2 cement mixers?
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
the saddest part is, this is not even the first time i've woken up in a shopping cart with a concussion.
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
Wake up. Eat bread. Find your dignity. Don't be late for work again.
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
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