omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
Oh my god. I just realized something amazing. If I get pregnant with a boy, that technically means I have a penis right??????
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
Yeah I'm at the doctors getting a shotand don't know how to tell them I'm still probably drunk from last night
The best was when you were crying, and trying to get the bouncer to "understand you AS A HUMAN BEING"
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
I was just trying to flirt with James Franco but she kept telling me to take shots out of Ron Burgundy's mouth
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
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