I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
Received world's greatest BJ while in a planetarium. Was seeing stars while seeing stars.
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
whoever threw up in my shampooo bottle is totally getting defriended on facebook.
i tried to stop you. you just kept saying your split ends needed punishment.
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
Is cereal technically a soup?
Fuck, I'm high.
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
We're going to brunch on Super Bowl Sunday. I am not a smart man.
You ate ashes out of my bong
Randomize
