Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
Sometimes, dog treats look like people treats.
she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
I'm trying to convey to the smoking hot Spanish cleaning lady at work that I want to bone her but I think it's getting lost in translation. How do you say "blowjob" in Spanish?
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
You merely adopted the alcohol. I was born into it. Molded by it. I didn't see the hang over until I was a man and by then it was only blinding.
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
Randomize
