Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
just next time i won't let coke make me think I'm superman and drink a shit ton.
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
there are 2 things i love giving: blowjobs & backrubs. how can i tell them that without sounding like a slut
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
Harry Potter. Singing. Sobering up. In that order.
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
He literally said from now on he's always banging chicks with asthma becuas it's such an ego booster
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
So I was at my annual OBGYN appointment and when she saw the bruises on the inside of my thigh she asked if I had been horse back riding...I think my burst of laughter then awkward silence answered the question for me.
Randomize
