So can we just skip dinner and I'll just pay you for a blowjob?
Don't tempt me, I need beer money.
Why does Thanksgiving make hot girls feel disgusting and fat girls feel horny? Its killing my prospects.
I'm sorry I didn't make it out, I got distracted by sparkley boobies.
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.
I was still in a towel. We hadn't even started drinking yet and the champagne bottle dropped and exploded literally up into my vagina.
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
My breasts were aching with rage.
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
The main motivators in my life are my sex drive and spite
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
Honestly cannot tell if I’m magical or really, really high.
Do you remember trying to sleep under the pool table while wearing a reflective vest?
Nope.
You kept saying you had to be safe.
Randomize
