HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
I climb out of my sunroof. I mean its kind of embarrassing but part of me feels awesome and ninja like.
he is the anna nicole to my 90 year-old billionaire. i'm grateful that he's fucking me, so i'm buying him shit.
Say something like you want him to fuck you behind a McDonald's. Guys secretly love weird shit like that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
Naked Twister starts at high noon
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The maintenance guy says happy birthday. Also, he likes your penis balloon.
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
You've got to be fucking kidding me. Do you think "Husband drunkenly pees all over floors" is reasonable grounds for divorce? So pissed off right now.
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
p.s i need to stop drunk texting my mom. she brings up text convos all the time and i have no idea what shes talking about...
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