***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
yesterday i saw a blind man guiding himself into a NYC tour bus... and i thought i waste money
It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
We call her skankles because she's a skank and she has cankles, I thought that was obvious
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
answer my text you professional douchebag
and i mean that in the cutest, flirtiest way possible
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
He walked into me masturbating to a framed picture of Bill Murray riding a t-rex
After we had sex he went to the kitchen, came back with a bag of funyuns and ate them buck ass naked in his bedroom doorway. Had no idea how to react to that one.
We just had a contest for who has less of a gag reflex...I am sad to admit that my mother won.
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
Randomize