what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
was stoked on phone sex until he started reciting lines from star wars
you told the cop you blew a .08 because you ate poppy seeds
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
Day 8 of being sober: Sniffed an empty beer bottle at a restaurent and almost licked it. This is not working
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
Here is a brilliant idea passed on from men who have that same regret. WEAR A FUCKING CONDOM ALWAYS.
Who am I sleeping next to in your bed? Where are you? Also when are you coming home... I need coffee.
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
In retrospect i can confidently say that the last two months of our relationship... i was only in it because i didnt wanna lose my list on his netflix account.
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
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