genius idea. im gonna paint my penis green like the serpent of sex
the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
She never called back. Financed a fleshlight.
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
Shrimp lo Mein doused in green apple Smirnoff is a rare delicacy only a few get to experience..guess I should consider myself lucky
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
I'm keeping track of how many times I've said "Shhh, act like you're not naked." in my life. So far, 3 times.
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
Just walked in and got handed a drink. Good service
I just need to get a little drunker before I realize I'm not straight
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
Public service announcement: Just bc it is Margarita Monday does NOT mean your stomach will readily accept that much alcohol. There IS a reason it isn't called Magical Monday. On that note, better luck on Tequila Tuesday.
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
Randomize
