Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
I woke up covered in sausage cart mustard and champagne
His kisses tasted like beef jerky and captain morgan. I'm pretty sure I came before he even took my clothes off.
I just realized my life is a timeline of drunken injuries.
We legitimately thought something was wrong with you until someone pointed out you were just doing the thriller dance
All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
So... remember when you threw an orange in the closet when we were 16 to make wine? Just found it. Not wine.
Why do I have "apologize to Dave Coulier" written on my hand?
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
The dick lei will go down in squad history
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
I made out with a 40 year old and told her we were dating then got kicked out of a gay bar. This is the day I stop drinking.
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
Randomize
