We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
After we were finished she said "That was like marriage sex". Should I take that as a compliment or insult?
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
I know, it's just the worst. Also, security almost took the burrito I brought for lunch. I thought I was going to have to pull a Liz Lemon and eat the whole thing before I could go through.
They also submitted to my demands for pizza
Breaking news: when you're gone every towel is a dick towel
I have tasted many bathrooms
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
Oh god I found a set of car keys in my pocket, and I have no idea who's they are
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