I'm going to jail i love you
K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
Ended up in his bed... He's passed out holding me and his bulldog is laying across my legs. Both snoring. HELP!! I wanna go home!
I really regret not asking “like a cupcake” when you asked me to eat your ass
I don’t care that he’s a decade younger. He’s cute and I need a good penising
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