no, no I am DEF NOT pregnant. typo. sorry, wanted to talk about us...
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
It feels like Jesus smacked me in the face with the new testament for drinking so much last night
As shirtless as possible
you know what would be perfect? if you flew in on a horse/cat holding taco bell and then you swooped me up and took me to disney world and it was magical
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
When you left the bar, you did two cartwheels and a heel click and RAN ALL THE WAY HOME.
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
I know it's super late on a work night, but can you drop by and bend me over my new motorcycle? I have tequila and tacos...
Randomize
