The first sip always goes straight to my vagina.
eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
you smelled like vodka, i think that's why my grandma liked you
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
Why the fuck did you text me at 4 in the morning telling me not to have sex with the bird?
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
If the boyfriend of the drunk girl you just met asks her if she made a "special friend" you're going to have a threesome. For future reference.
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
I'm going to get pregnant and die... Mean Girls warned me about this but I didn't listen
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
Randomize
