i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
So I told her I dislocated my shoulder and she said "well okay. I can either be on top or blow you."
Decisions, decisions.
This text is addressed to sober me: getting drunk by yourself may have seemed like a Good idea at first bit it can tell you that it wasn't ad fun as you thought it would be
Ps your lap top bag is FULL of empty beets
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
You gave me your shirt to use as a napkin every time I spilled beer on myself. Before we went to the bar.
No more. You can't have nice things, and vodka is a nice thing.
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
Just when I decided to go get a taco and a blunt cake it starts raining. Coincidence? or divine intervention?
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
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