I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
I can't decide who is the bigger alcoholic: you for opening that bottle of wine just now or me for hearing it in the other room over the air conditioner
Oh. My. God. Dad smoked a bowl. He's been playing cards...I just told a story and when I was done, he got really close to my face and very seriously asked me if he had cheese in his beard. I'm about to die.
In case you wake up wondering why your eyes hurt... You were claiming to be Zeus and that mortal weapons couldn't harm you. Some chick took it as a challenge and pepper sprayed you. Sorry dude.
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
You kept hiding under tables and grabbing people's legs and shouting SHARK ATTACK.
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Magyver!
I was in line at Panera when I got the pic you sent to your coworker. I just showed your vag to a soccer mom. The vibrator was a nice touch.
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