And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
I didn't realize how hung over I was until I rolled over and the world rolled over with me.
Are you for fucking real.? He divorced me just because he got a fucking girlfriend.?!
He just got home drunk. He ate 5 snack cakes, said Little Debbie's his bitch, went upstairs and fell asleep.
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
"Bring the kids" is the most terrifying 3 words I've ever heard in my life.
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
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