i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
She makes me want to have breakfast margaritas every day
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
I'm so hungover I literally am considering drinking from the fishtank to avoid getting out of bed.
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
So last night took an interesting turn.. Never thought I'd say I had to pick up my glasses off the floor of a strip club
Two words: blizzard sex
I've talked to too many cops in one week and I haven't even committed any crimes. I hate the suburbs
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
I'm having leftover pizza for breakfast. I'm clearly not the greatest at this adult thing.
There's a kitten on my face and I'm druuuunk
Where you been?
Please tell me this is a booty call
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
Randomize
