when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
Just hungoverly hit my funny bone with a hot straightener. Triple threat.
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
why is my new profile picture on Facebook one of me with a bunch of strangers on an elevator?
Come to me. Jacob is confessing his love and all I want is a hot dog. With chili. Not love.
that freshman chick we always see on the weekends walked into art class wearing a jaegermeister shirt and holding a monster, which she proceeded to shotgun with a pair of scissors. It sickens me to know I will never achieve her level
She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
Did I tell you that I told him I deleted his dick pics and he almost started crying?
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
It's scary that my vibrator is a dangerous weapon. I want a new one.
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
Randomize
