i wish they had a 'baby daddy' section in halmark, like, "hey, i know you didn't want this child and you're doing a horrible job, but here's to making you cry on fathers day"
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
Oh my god, I hid a wine bottle in my boot.
Apparantly 7 1/2 Vicodin is a 1/2 too many.
I hit him with a car. Nothing says I hate you more than backing into someone with a fucking car.
Lesson learned. Never get fingered on an airplane.
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
I'm at about main and main street
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
Beer. Pizza. Seething Rage. I will be full of two of these things tonight. You get to decide which two.
...i have a beer in one hand, and a chicken wing in the same. typical tuesday, right?
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
Randomize
