sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
It honestly wasnt my fault this time. i was in shock. WHO THE FUCK OWNS A PEACOCK?!
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
Lost gin update. Blackout me found and re-hid the bottle. Left a note to myself saying, "GOOD LUCK, SUCKER!"
I'll tell these girls I'm like the pet adoption center...don't play with it if you're not taking it home.
Yes, he does have a boomerang dick. No matter how many times I throw it away, it keeps coming right back and winds up hitting me in the head.
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
That was just an endearing nickname I called you before. I'm not gonna call you a filthy slut now that you are one, I don't want to hurt your feelings.
Also, what day were you thinkin we should trip balls at the children's museum?
His exact words: "I don't have anything you can't treat with antibiotics."
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
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