To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
i want to get drunk and sing the national anthem on your roof again please.
He kept telling me how extraordinarily clean my ears were.
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
I'm sorry I murdered your sperm with my alcohol saturated Olympic uterus.
Just got attacked by a family of raccoons, I have the worst luck.
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
Standing here wondering if its a good idea to cook pork chops in the toaster or not.
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
Randomize
