that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
I just realized I'm trading you a pregnancy test for the morning after pill...
It's been a bad semester.
My mouth tastes like what I imagine a hobo's skin would taste like.
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
I'm still pretty drunk right now, but when this hangover hits me, I'm going to be super pissed. It's a preemptive never drinking again.
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
Randomize
