All time low... just gave a strip tease to the theme song from Law&Order SVU.
We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
you know you made some mistakes when your last two boyfriends are both obsessed with women's curling...
No one figured out why I brought along the vibrating massager.
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
I didn't notice because vodka
Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head.
Well I just put wine in my tea
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
Dude I'm pretty sure everyone in my office knows I fucked our boss...can I ask for anything better?
Randomize
