So I'm banging this nun...
Isn't that how all good stories start? I like it already...
she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
Note to self: don't jizz on a surface cleaned with Tilex. It WILL turn purple.
Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
There is no way to say this. Dude, I peed your bed. No questions, no answers. My flight leaves in 30 minutes. Use my detergent. Also, THE VODKA IN THE FRIDGE IS YOURS.
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
When I go to hand him the blunt and he's eating a cookie and responds with "let me hit this cookie"
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
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