Just got done shaving my balls. You were right.
my mom found all the used condoms in my bed side table
whatd she say to you?
no words- put them all in a circle, put the bible in the middle
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
Apparently she saw two women get in a slapping match over a comforter at target yesterday. She said it was awesome. Clearly I take after her.
Was I really yelling "girls night" at random chicks before stealing and drinking all their shots?
So far today I've found 3.5 million dollars in savings. Pretty sure management is gonna start buying me hookers if getting laid has this much payoff
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
It's a lot harder to work after sex than it is to work drunk... just saying.
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
Randomize