I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
who knew that if you vomit while skydiving the puke goes up towards the people that are behind you.
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
Also, putting laundry hampers on my head and pretending I'm an astronaut is a good way to get caught in every door frame in the house.
Just saw you in traffic. You may have noticed me, I was the corpse driving the white car.
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
You danced?!
I just jiggle to the beat like a sexy lava lamp
you gave me money for the cab and then walked home..
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
I need you to get the emergency bail money out if the stuffed panda and go to the police station tot bail me out. I should be there in 20 minutes.
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