im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
Just got mistaken for a cardboard cutout ad in line at Taco Bell. New low?
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
He asked me who my new boyfriend was and I showed him a picture of my sex toys.
i refuse to sex anyone who doesn't get my lord of the rings references. no exceptions.
So our bartender was in the bathroom the same time I was so I ordered a beer mid stream.....is that weird?
Why can't all sociopaths be as fabulous as me?
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
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