Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
gave myself the "you're a really good girlfriend" talk on the way to where i intentionally cheated on him. i am my own drunken therapist.
He asked me out while I'm back in town. I have to acknowledge and honor his persistence.
Your vagina must be laced with cocaine...
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
Just tell your mom you have to go somewhere half naked with a strange man. She'll understand
Your topless pictures make me question reality
Accepting his friend request would be the Facebook equivalent of pity sex.
STOP GETTING GIRLS PREGNANT IN MY BED.
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
Accidentally texted co-worker instead of bf “I’m wfh tomrw. Nooner? 💦”
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
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