I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
do you know how bad I want you right now?
As bad as i want you to stop texting me?
is that a hint?
I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
woke up with a used condom shoved in my ear. i officially hate alcohol.
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
But we only had three ninja turtles. So everyone that would ask us where Donatello was, we would say "what? He's gone? Shredder is at it again!"
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
I need to immerse myself in a tub of peroxide to kill whatever traces of him are on me.
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
Randomize
