You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
He showed up to a baby shower and kept telling everyone he was late because he was pregaming. And then tried honking the pregnant girls tits
No, it wasn't really a sexy 'I'm going to go masturbate.' It was an 'I'm going to go masturbate' that implied I was going to drink a tall boy of Mikes and cry while I looked at lesbian porn.
Things I Learned Tonight: I have no future in goat wrangling. Herding. Whatever you call the ridiculosity that just transpired.
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
Holy shit, did you actually CHOOSE to get hit by the alcohol truck last night?
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
I came back from England with a face tattoo and the only thing anyone can talk about is my beard.
Girl... I just woke up with a bloody mary in a to go cup on my nightstand and two hours late for work.. I'm sorry i can't go out on weekdays anymore. Luckily my boss was just happy i was ok
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
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